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Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Sitting and Thinking.


   Sometimes I just sit in the quiet of my living room, while Justin is at work and Paisley is sound asleep on the porch, and picture life in just a few months. It's hard to imagine all of the changes that will take place between now and then.

  But it doesn't take an empty house to get lost in a daydream. Often when Justin comes home from work, we join each other on the couch, heist my shirt a little, just enough to reveal the bump that is gradually turning into a ball, and talk, and pray, and giggle, and wait for the next Little kick that will take us into another world of imagination.

   In around 4 and a half months, Justin and I will have a little human. A little creature that depends solely on us for survival, to be cleaned, to be fed, to be loved. As my closet seems to offer me far less wardrobe options than it use to, it is hard not to think about all of the other changes that will take place, besides not being able to fit into my favorite pair of jeans.

  Sometimes fear takes over, sometimes we wonder what we have gotten ourselves into, and sometimes we're still in a state of shock. But those feelings last as long as a fleeting summer breeze. We are in total amazement of how such a tiny being, this week, the length of the average banana, could have such an impact on who we are becoming.

  I have recently been able to decipher Little's kicks from the gas bubbles that far to often accompany this dear pregnancy. Just Saturday night, Justin was able to feel her kick for the first time. The excitement, the sheer joy that ran across his face in the form of a grin was breathtaking, heartwarming, and just what I needed to see.

  He's been wonderful. Not that he wasn't before, but somehow this little wiggle worm living in very close quarters with my belly button has somehow brought out the delicate side of my hardworking, get-the-job-done, kind of man.

  With all of the upcoming changes just over the horizon, we anticipate the smells, the noise, and the lack of sleep that comes along with having a new baby, but we also look forward to making silly faces, watching Little grow, and making new traditions as we venture down the road as a family of three. We know it won't always be easy, but we look forward to journey, the commitment, and the smiles.

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