5 months ago.

There have been several days in the last year that have completely rocked our world, leaving us with a perspective that is far different than one we had ever dreamed of having. 

January 25 started it all. A day that broke our hearts beyond our ability to descibe. A day that changed the way I would look at pregnancy and the uncertainty of it, forever.

January 28 brought us back into the light, as we learned more of our son's condition and more on the power of prayer. We felt God's strength wrap around us, and as our hearts were lifted, we walked out of our exam room knowing our future was full of uncertainty, but that uncertainty would be accompanied by a lot of joy, too! 

These two very memorable days will always hold a special place in our hearts, for they started something uniquely special, a journey we would not have chosen on our own, but one we are so grateful to be a part of. 

Between those days and now, we have had quite a few that left us feeling pretty low, but through it all, we were graced with hope and strength. 

Our journey through Little Brother's pregnancy wasn't exactly easy, but all of the heartache we experienced just made God's purpose and love all the more clear - because at 5:49pm on June 20th, a set of perfect little lungs filled air, and we heard our brand new baby boy for the very first time. In that moment, we knew what pure love, peace, and utmost joy felt like. 

We endured five months of an emotional rollercoaster. Five months of waiting and praying and wanting so desperately just to know more than an ultrasound, blood work, or doctor could ever tell us. We just wanted our son. And now, as I watch him sleep on the bed right next to me, I have exactly what I had been longing for. 

I have a son - and he is perfect. 

I look at Elam and I am overcome with so many emotions. I see him as the little boy on the ultrasound screen at 17 1/2 weeks who we thought wouldn't survive. I see him as the little boy we were told we could abort at 18 weeks. 

But more than any of these, I see him as the perfectly created little boy that God has beautifully chosen to bless our family.  And with that, I smile, and thank our Lord for the gifts we are so undeservingly given.