How many times do I have to teach hyperbole before one student gets it?

To preface this post: I love my students, I love my classroom, and I love my school.

However-I just do not understand how my little angels' brains work.

How many times do I have to teach the different types of figurative language before one, JUST ONE, student understands what the heck I am talking about?

Since January, the students in my 5th grade reading resource classroom have been reviewing the South Carolina Standard 5.1.2 and 5.1.3. These standards review point of view and figurative language. Since January the students have been given charts to fill out, booklets to make, quick writes on the board, draw a question out of the basket....anything I can think of to get their minds working and able to apply what I am teaching to the passages we are reading.

Thankfully we have just recently passed the poetry section of our curriculum. Let me tell you, it is hard stuff teaching poetry when students do not know the difference between alliteration and personification. Boy!

We have now moved on to the folklore unit. We are studying Tall Tales, Legends, Fables, and Myths. As we review point of view, I figured it would be a simple task for them to apply to Tall Tales.

After reading John Henry, I asked my students what point of view the Tall Tale was written in. (I figured it really only gave them two options, since a Tall Tale is obviously not 1st person, and we only talk about 1st, 3rd Omnicient, and 3rd Limited.)  Hands went up! "OOOh OOh Miss Parrott, I know, pick me, I know!" So I said, "Ok student #1, what is the point of view?" "Miss Parrott, John Henry is written in 1st person."

"So, Student #1, what is first person, what do we look for when we think a story is written in 1st person?"  "OH, OH, OH, Miss Parrott, I got it this time. I know. I'm right now. Please let me answer!!!" ...I had faith, maybe I haven't been teaching all this time in vain... "So, Student #1, try again, I'm sure you have it now!"

"Miss Parrott, it is written in 2nd person, right? There are two main characters in this story, so it is 2nd person right?!"

Okay, so this really did surprise me! We have never even mentioned 2nd person!!!!

At the end of the day my cooperating teacher and I were talking. I mentioned to her how discouraged I was that the students seemed to not be really understanding or getting any of the information I am teaching.

So, can you guess what next week's lessons are going to focus on? Point of View!

Monday: 1st person! I am going to dress up like a movie star and proclaim, "It's all about ME!" (Hopefully I will be cuter than the picture below!)

Tuesday: 3rd person limited! I am going to make blinders for all of my students! They are all going to wear them, and maybe then they will understand what it means to have a limited perspective.

Wednesday: 3rd person omnicient! Here comes Santa! :) I can't wait to bust out my Santa Clause hat in March! I will use Santa as an example because he "sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake..." He's all-knowing!

Thursday and Friday will focus on other things...because I actually have to teach other things besides Point of View. :-(

My students will probably make fun of me for dressing up (they are at that stage that EVERYTHING embarrasses them! Oh, 5th grade!) I will sacrifice my pride and humble myself for the sake of their learning.....

(Student names were withheld, in fear of one day a student's parents stumble across this post...)